The final few nauseating days before a deadlocked election are critical. They mark the moment when many undecided voters finally put the proverbial licked finger in the wind to assess the vibes—if not necessarily all the policy positions—and break one way or the other. Anyone doing so at the moment, however, may be surprised to discover that the atmosphere on one side has gotten a little, well, nutty. That’s right: Donald Trump’s campaign, and its biggest supporters, are going all in on . . . Peanut the squirrel.
For the many understandably uninitiated, Peanut the squirrel was a social media-famous pet who is unfortunately no longer with us. A man named Mark Longo took him in seven years ago, after the animal’s mother was hit by a car in New York City, and he’s kept Peanut ever since in an animal sanctuary in the hamlet of Pine City, near the Pennsylvania border. In the years since, Peanut has amassed followings in the many thousands on Instagram and TikTok, where he could often be found eating adorably, or wearing jaunty little squirrel ensembles.
On October 30, New York’s Department of Environmental Conservation (DEC) took the squirrel, along with a raccoon named Fred, apparently acting on complaints that they were being kept illegally, possibly posing a health hazard. (According to state law, New Yorkers are required to be licensed in order to care for such critters.) During the ensuing chaos of the DEC coming to check on the animals, Peanut reportedly bit someone assisting in the investigation. Both he and Fred were subsequently euthanized, in order to test the pair for rabies.
It was a more tragic ending than one might usually find in a social media-famous adoption story. Licensed or not, Peanut’s owner was upset about it.
According to Longo’s framing, however, this was not a doleful tale of a standard investigation that went sideways, but rather an alarming example of Big Government overreach with lethal consequences.
“Honestly, this still kind of feels surreal,” Longo told the Associated Press. “That the state that I live in actually targeted me and took two of the most beloved animals on this planet away, didn’t even quarantine them. They took them from my house and just killed them.”
But while it certainly tracks that a grieving pet owner might channel his emotions into an external villain, it seems like quite a stretch for anyone in a position of power and influence to attempt the same thing on a mass scale, for the entire electorate.
Try telling that to the world’s richest man, however.
So here’s the thing … pic.twitter.com/X9En85Qw1Z
— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) November 4, 2024
Elon Musk’s pinned tweet at the time of this writing warns his 203 million followers on X that, “If they will raid a house for a squirrel, they’re sure as shit going to come after you.” It’s a message that should concern roughly zero people who are not currently housing squirrels without a proper license, and yet it is one of at least 20 similar messages Musk has posted since Friday.
The full-tilt sensationalizing isn’t restricted to Musk, of course. Far from it. According to the New York Post, JD Vance says Donald Trump is “fired up” over Peanut, while Fox News has both fanned the flames and later posted about the squirrel setting off a “social media firestorm.” Meanwhile, the official X account of the House’ of the ‘s Judiciary Committee, on the Republican side, posted “Justice for Peanut” on Saturday evening—as though this were both an appropriate message to broadcast, and one that everyone reading would intuitively understand.
The message has since trickled down to the billionaire donor class and the MAGA faithful, more generally. Peanut the squirrel is now officially the right-wing outrage lightning rod of the day, with many social media users posting squirrel emoji in the hopes of avenging him.
Next, they’ll take your child. https://t.co/9mm8I3VNyS
— Bill Ackman (@BillAckman) November 3, 2024
I suspect the reason the Peanut story is resonating so much is that it's such a clarifying example of how mundane and pervasive petty tyranny has become.
— HUNTSMAN 🏴☠️ (@maphumanintent) November 2, 2024
I'm losing it pic.twitter.com/LhHQiJtYTY
— James Medlock (@jdcmedlock) November 4, 2024
It’s a message that seems bound to bite its messengers, though, as wild squirrels are wont to do. For one thing, it’s just silly. Unlike when the Trump campaign touts women slain by illegal immigrants, even after those women’s families have called them out for exploitation, there’s a fairly low ceiling for the level of fear one can coax out of squirrel-euthanasia. For another thing, many of the more buttoned-up conservatives holding up Peanut’s minder as a symbol of American innocence and decency may be crestfallen to learn that Mark Longo is also an OnlyFans porn actor, who goes by the name—and buckle up for this—Squirrel Daddy.
But the main reason going all in on the plight of Peanut the squirrel at the 11th hour in a dead-heat election might be a mistake is because it just looks desperate and slight. Prospective voters conducting a last-minute vibe check, and then being bombarded with this message, might rightly wonder if this truly is the most pressing matter in the country at this precarious moment.
If the closing argument of a politician’s campaign is that the most terrifying words in the English language are, “I’m from the government and I’m here to help your squirrel,” then . . . that politician might be flailing.